Signs of a Toxic Mother

Dealing with a Toxic Mother can be very draining. Here are some of the Signs to look out for:

The most significant relationship in your life, in my opinion, should be with your mother. This is the first person you have connected with on a deep level—spiritually, emotionally, and physically. She is the first human connection any baby will ever know.

The relationship with their mother sets the stage for every other future relationship a baby will have.

However, not all mothers are maternal, and not all mothers have been able to develop the natural bond that should exist between mother and child. It can be hard to understand how a mother can behave in such a destructive way towards her offspring, but we need to realize that maybe she herself was brought up in a similar situation.

Maybe her mother was unavailable to her, and she is just repeating the pattern that she learned and is familiar to her.

An emotionally unavailable mother will not be able to shows empathy towards her child if they are in need of reassurance. A toxic mother never wants to understand your perspective. She may not be able to put herself in your shoes or be willing to let you voice your views or opinions.

This type of mother will take things literally, will not be able to see her shortcomings and downfalls, and will make it all about her by shifting the focus to why she behaves how she does, with no regard to your feelings.

Lack of boundaries can be another common sign of a toxic mother. She will expect you to be at her beck and call. Everything revolves around her.

This mother cannot see when she has done something wrong, is not willing to take any responsibility her actions and will blame others.

How to Deal with a Toxic Mother

If you are unfortunate enough to have a Toxic Mother, here are a few tips on how you might be able to deal with her:

• Look after yourself – Put yourself first. Self care is very important as you have to look after your mental health. Dealing with someone like this, especially your mother, who is supposed to be there for you and loving you unconditionally can have a severe effect on your mental health. There is nothing worse than having to be constantly treading on eggshells because you are waiting for the next explosion.

• Control the amount of time you spend with her – Any interaction you have with your mother might be best to do in small doses. That way, you are not exposing yourself for long periods when you are in her company. You control the amount of time you spend with her.

• Take control and set yourself some boundaries.

• Be mindful – Learning to be mindful about where and how you choose to put energy into your life can be an insightful tool. It can allow you to have a sense of space around your mother, which focuses on the positives and what you can do for yourself. Things don’t fix themselves overnight.

• Tell her honestly how you feel – Try having a talk with your mother and tell her honestly how you feel and how her behavior has a negative effect on you. You might be surprised she may not even realize what she is doing as it’s most probably been so ingrained in her, and no one else has taken her to the task before.

• Consider therapy – If you fear talking to her alone, how about getting a mediator or suggest going to see a therapist? I would highly recommend you working with a therapist who deals with Inner healing and Emotional trauma work. It is very important to get to the root cause of your issues.

Your mother’s behavior would have had an effect on you, and you may, as a result, have some limiting beliefs you are holding about yourself. You could have feelings of not being good enough or self-blame. Being treated this way is a form of emotional abuse, and these scars go deeper than any physical attack because they cannot be seen or measured .

•  Cut ties – If all else fails, then my last suggestion is to cut ties. There is nothing wrong with removing toxic people from your life, no matter if it is your mother.

I’m sure if you were in a toxic relationship with a partner, she might well be one of the first people to tell you to remove yourself from that relationship. Just know you are not alone and that help is out there for you if you need it.

I’m sure if you were in a toxic relationship with a partner, she might well be one of the first people to tell you to remove yourself from that relationship. Just know you are not alone and that help is out there for you if you need it.